I want to shift the world out of limiting, and false beauty standards which not only keep us living in fear and shame in ourselves - but that breed fear and competition amongst women. I want us to be able to move beyond the overwhelming idea that our value is determined by the men in our lives, or by the supposedly finite amount of affection, money, opportunity, and attention they can afford to toss our way if we're deemed to be enough.Read More
And as the conference started to loom closer, I could feel myself starting to slip back into some of those old patterns - although thankfully, I've kept to my limit of two coffees a day, and I haven't taken up smoking again.Read More
Over the last month or so, there have been a bunch of things happening in what you might generally describe as "Progressive Spaces" created by people who consider themselves to be free thinking and open minded. Some of it great, some of it problematic, and some of it down right disgusting - from all sides.Read More
Holy Crap! Thank you for such a fantastic response to A Rad Bitch Re-Boot!! On Monday, I shared with you all about my new One on One Coaching Package, A Rad Bitch Re-Boot, and I have to say, I've been totally blown away by the comments and response I've received since!
I'll be sharing some of my own story, and letting you in on:
- What I've successfully achieved over the last 12 months,
- How I've done it,
and more importantly,
- How YOU can reach your goals too!
I'll share how investing in further training and one-on-one coaching have genuinely shifted my reality and opened up a whole host of new friendships and opportunities that I never would have encountered otherwise!
By the end of the night, you'll have learned:
- How to create clarity around your skills, passions and dreams to finally take action towards them.
- How to build the confidence that you have something totally valuable to share with the world - even when that bitchy little voice in your head is trying to distract you and fill your head with noise and negativity.
- How to maintain motivation and keep on moving forward when everything feels overwhelming and as if you're not getting anywhere.
- The value of collaborating and seeking support - especially when it comes to holding yourself accountable and actually get shit done!
The Hang Out is going to be a super fun opportunity for us to connect across state lines and international borders, in real time - and you'll have the chance to ask me any burning questions you may have.
Being Easter Monday, if you have any left over, bring your festive novelty shaped chocolates, a mug of hot chocolate, a blanket and your favourite notebook.
A Rad Bitch Pyjama Party Google Hang Out Details!
Time: 8.30 - 9.30 PM AEST Date: Monday 6th April Where: HERE How: Click on the link above just before 8.30 PM and I'll meet you there!
If you have any questions, or anything in particular you'd like me to cover, please feel free to let me know ahead of time by commenting below.
If you'd like to schedule in a complimentary 30 Minute Virtual Coffee Date to see if coaching with me is right for you, please click HERE and I'll be in touch within 24 Hours.
I can't wait to speak with you on Monday night!
This weekend has been far quieter than the last few - and definitely quieter than I had planned on this one being. I had honestly been really looking forward to heading out both last night and today, but unfortunately have caught myself an ick. It's nothing serious, just a cold, but definitely enough to have taken my voice away and replaced it with a hearty deep and gravely bark. In the spirit of focusing on the positive, and considering that I missed out on seeing them play last night, I recommend that you all go and check out the psych-rock goodness of House of Laurence. Seriously, their tour diaries always look like their adventures are super fun.
Add this to the facts that I was supposed to attend a picnic this afternoon to help my friends celebrate their first wedding anniversary, and that my neighbours have set up an outdoor cinema in our courtyard and are currently chilling out on bean bags watching Clint Eastwood films, and I'm dealing with some seriously Knowledge Of Missing Out.
So, what's a girl to do when she's feeling ick and trying not to cough up a lung? Well, in my case I'm using this as a healthy reminder to take better care of myself. I've spent most of today rugged up in my PJ's, I've taken a nap and done some writing.
While I don't want to weigh in on the whole "Food as Medicine" thing that's become a massive, polarising and sensationalist shit-storm in the media at the moment, for me there's no denying that certain foods at least help me feel more comfortable, and as if I'm taking care of myself when I'm sick.
In that spirit, I've decided to share with you all some of my favourite comfort foods, and most of these have been passed down across generations - and not just in my family.
Hot Fresh Lemon and Ginger Tea in the mornings.
Anything with Garlic, Chilli and brightly coloured vegetables.
I'd love to say that I up my Vitamin C levels with Fresh Citrus Fruits, but the truth is that I have never liked Oranges or Grapefruits, and I can really only handle them if their flavour is buried beneath lots of other yummy fruits.
I do however LOVE fresh berries, so I eat as many of those as possible to help boost the anti-oxidant levels (but mainly because I love them).
Creamy Pumpkin Soup is by far my MOST favourite comfort food when I'm not feeling well. Usually, when I cook soup for myself, I roast the pumpkin, garlic and onion in maple syrup before cooking the actual soup. I've had to resort to buying pre-cooked soup this time (I know, I'm devastated by this) because we've recently discovered the biggest flaw with The Kitteh Palace having an original kitchen - our oven doesn't work!!! Also, my stab mixer died and I haven't had the opportunity to replace it yet, so I can't puree anything at the moment.
Another massive favourite of mine, is a Hot "Buttered" Rum Toddy. I've had lots of requests for my recipe for this, which is honestly the entire reason I'm blogging about having a cold in the first place!
So, without further a-do, here is my Hot "Buttered" Rum Recipe, although it's really just a list of ingredients that I never measure, I just add in willy nilly as I see fit, so use your own responsible discretion here.
Sailor Jerry Spiced rum
Nuttelex Spread (if you're making a non-vegan version, just use butter)
Agave Nectar, of Maple Syrup (again, if you're not vegan, you can use honey)
Ground Cinnamon, Nutmeg, Cloves and Cardamom
Fresh Cloudy Apple Juice.
To make it all hot, I heat the apple juice in a saucepan over the stove, before pouring it over all of the other ingredients - either directly in your own cup, or in a teapot if you're making enough to share.
I'd love to know, what are some of your favourite comfort food recipes when you have an ick?
Until next time, stay healthy, everyone!
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In my last post I made a passing mention of the cult classic 80's film, 'Heathers' - purely in reference to the fact that I'd been playing croquet at a picnic over the weekend, and to be honest, it's been on my mind ever since. It turned out that nobody else at the picnic had seen Heathers before, so I gave a super brief, non-spoiling description to the interested guests that, "It was a cult 80's high school film starring Winona Ryder and featured heavy doses of dark humour".
The comparison was immediately drawn between it and 'Jawbreaker', a film which I remember watching on VHS when I was still in the early years of high school, and starred Rose McGowan and featured a cameo appearance her then boyfriend Marilyn Manson. For the record, I really enjoyed this film when I was young - and I'm a little tempted to give it, and 'The Craft' another viewing - just for shits and giggles and "old times sake".
Anyway, this all got me thinking about pop culture references to Girl Gangs - particularly in the films I grew up watching - and the interactions between female characters in them, and I was struck by how overwhelmingly negative the relationships were.
In pretty much all of them, there's backstabbing bitchiness, competition over boys, perfectionism, idealised superficial beauty - and murderous cat fighting.
Even if I think back to stuff I watched as a kid - 'The Addams Family Values', 'Daria', and the relationship between Darlene and Becky in 'Roseanne' - the sarcasm, snark and straight-up resentment that played out between these fictional girls, was intense! And yes, I totally identified with the "odd-girl out" in all of these examples.
About the only examples I could think of which featured solid Girl Gangs, were 'Now & Then', and 'The Baby-Sitters Club', which was originally a book series (books that I devoured copies of faster than my Mum could bring the next one home from the Second Hand Book Shop) before being made into a film. The fact that I grew up and became a Nanny, is no freaking coincidence when you think about this.
This isn't just limited to films intended for teen audiences ('Bridesmaids' is a good example of this), although it's super prevalent in the whole high school film genre.
In reality, most female relationships are not this fraught - and for the most part, these films are a great excuse to hang out on the couch in your PJ's with your own Girl Gang, eat pop corn and laugh at the absurdity of it all. Yet the overwhelming message in most of these instances, is that as girls, we are automatically and intrinsically pitted against one another and will fight to the death.
There's rarely any real, deep learning - let alone genuine self-acceptance that takes place by the final act of the film, and whatever "feel-good" message we end up with, is usually pretty generic and superficially blase. I could very easily get into a rant about how this is all because patriarchy is still a thing, but that's not really the point of why I wanted to write this post.
I suppose I've been thinking about this sort of thing a lot more recently - especially since I created The Rad Bitch Girl Gang. Although in truth, I've probably been thinking about this - at least on a personal level, since I started on this whole adventure of rebuilding my own world over the last few years - because my focus is on creating positive, supportive relationships and safe spaces which encourage and facilitate growth.
So as not to sugar-coat stuff, I've definitely had my share of falling-outs with girlfriends, and regrettably have dished out as much Girl-on-Girl negativity as I've copped over the years, but it's a pattern I've worked damn hard to recognise, repair, to change and improve upon.
One thing I have DEFINITELY recognised over the years, is that I am far more likely to treat others well, and to feel confident in my relationships when I'm feeling confident and comfortable within myself.
I believe that there are three sides to this:
- First of all, we have to do the work to create our own genuine sense of self confidence.
- Secondly, there's the Karmic side - What you put out into the world comes back unto you.
- And thirdly, I wholeheartedly believe that we teach others how we to be treated through how we treat ourselves.
As much as I think it would be cool to have a well known pop-culture reference to point out as an example, and confidently say, "YES! THIS!! This is exactly how my Girl Gang feels!" I honestly can't think of one - yet! So, in the meantime, I suppose I'm working to create what I hope to see more of in the world - groups of amazing girls and women who treat themselves and one another beautifully.
I'm proud of the fact that The Girl Gang is a safe space for many of The Rad Bitches to share and support one another, and I'm proud to know some incredible women who are working to empower women in ways that will seriously change the world.
Remember, each of us is enough as we are.
There is enough in the world for each of us.
PS: '10 Things I Hate About You' will probably ALWAYS be my favourite high school movie, ever.
To download your copy of my FREE eBook 'A Rad Bitch's How to Guide to Life: From Post Break-Up Survival Mode, to Rocking at Life', click HERE. [contact-form][contact-field label='Name' type='name' required='1'/][contact-field label='Email' type='email' required='1'/][contact-field label='Comment' type='textarea' required='1'/][/contact-form]
TIME: 2pm - 4pm
WHERE: Melbourne, Victoria (exact venue TBA)
TICKETS: $55 each through Eventbrite
Join Kym Seletto, author of ‘A Rad Bitch’s How to Guide to Life’ and Master of Real Talk, for an afternoon filled with some of her favourite things: Coffee, Cakes, and Coaching!
The Tea Party will be a professionally catered event, in a gorgeous Melbourne location - yet to be announced.
There will be cakes, scones, tea - and obvs. coffee (duh, of course!), as well as a professional photographer to capture all of the fun of the afternoon.
Best of all, there will be the opportunity to spend an afternoon in amazing company getting to meet fellow Rad Bitches in person!
I'll also be talking about how I became a Rad Bitch in the first place, and why I decided to study Health and Wellness Coaching, before leading a group coaching session around creating actionable goals and intentions for creating your own Girl Boss life in 2015.
I'm also super excited to announce that we will have a special Guest Rad Bitch Speaker joining us!
Ticket price includes a bonus 30 Minute one-on-one Virtual Coffee Date with Kym after the event.
Your ticket price includes: Delicious catering, The opportunity to meet likeminded Rad Bitches in a gorgeous setting, A Rad Bitch's How to Guide to Life Group Coaching Session, A Special Guest Rad Bitch Speaker on the day, as well as a Bonus 30 Minute Rad Bitch Virtual Coffee Date with Kym Seletto after the event.
Jordan and I have just returned home after spending Christmas together in one of my favourite parts of the world, Merimbula on the 'Sapphire Coast' in New South Wales. We stayed in this stunning apartment which had literally JUST been renovated. It was the perfect location to chill out, unwind and reflect on some of the amazing things that happened over the past twelve months. Of course we also spent plenty of time on the beach, swimming, paddle boarding, and enjoying the sunshine with family and friends.
I know 2014 was difficult and challenging for some of my friends and readers, and I know many people are looking forward to a fresh new year filled with new opportunities.
While I don't believe that anything happens for a reason, I do believe that everything we experience is an opportunity to learn and grow as a person.
With that said, I'd love to share some of my wins for 2014, and invite you all to share yours!
At the start of the year, I sat down with a fresh notebook and a copy of the Kikki.K edition of Shannah Kennedy's book, 'Simplify Structure Succeed' and wrote down pages of goals I hoped to achieve over the next few years.
I listed things like having a loving partner who complimented me as a person and would support me in my crazy, that I'd love to own a vintage bike and a Mini Cooper, to live in a cute functional apartment, to study, spend time at the beach, and to surround myself with positive and inspiring people who encourage me to be the best person I can.
I wanted to feel more relaxed, to be more organised, and to get more consistent sleep.
I wrote that I wanted to be financially secure and not living payday to payday.
I wanted to cook fresh healthy meals for myself each day, and cut down the amount of coffee I was drinking.
I wrote about cuddling up in front of the heater with a blanket, a mug of soup, a good book and The Kittehs during the cooler months, and time at the beach when it's hot.
In no way did I ever imagine that I would achieve even HALF of what I wrote down, let alone within the year.
As crazy as it sounds, I've not only achieved these goals, but I've achieved even MORE!
Jordan and I are about to share our 12 Month Anniversary, we moved into our Dream Apartment: "The Kitteh Palace" in June (after our first Broken Dream Apartment didn't work out as I'd hoped), I began studying Health and Wellness Coaching and have started building my new business, I've attended networking events and conferences AND I even spoke at one!
I started my blog, made new friends, travelled interstate and stayed in five star accommodation, I have a bright pink bike and a black MINI, I've enjoyed plenty of cuddles with Kittehs and cups of soup and so many interesting books!
Most of all, I've met amazing women and forged closer friendships with some very special people.
I'm working on my Money Story, but it's a lot more positive now than it has ever been. I have a budget now, and realistic plans for increasing my income into the new year.
I stick to a healthy sleep routine and I was introduced to Barre Body classes thanks to my friend Emma.
I'm so grateful for everything I've achieved, learned or experienced this year - the challenges which forced me to innovate and grow, the people who have offered me a safe space to learn to open up and to be vulnerable, the kindness of those who share their time, food, knowledge, friendship and support.
I am grateful that I pushed myself, that I have trusted my gut, taken risks and wholeheartedly believed that I am capable and deserving of better, then I set to work creating by reality.
I'm still learning to become a better communicator, and not to overcommit. I'm still striving to take consistent care of myself and eat healthy delicious food everyday.
2015 will bring some more exciting changes and challenges as I shift into the final stages of my course, and the next phases of building my Coaching business.
Thank you for being part of my year, and bringing your awesome into my life. xx
It's been a really interesting couple of weeks here at The Kitteh Palace, as always, I've been pretty busy, and to be completely honest with you, at times things have felt just a little hectic. There have been a couple of nights when I've crashed into my armchair after work, given up on the idea of cooking dinner. Having battled extreme fatigue levels, anxiety and depression at various times during my life, I'm now extremely aware of my needs, and the importance of incorporating self care in my day to day life, so I've been working at holding the ship steady, while zipping along.
The very night that I published my 'About' page on this blog, I received a phone call from a friend who I used to work with when I was about 20. Back when we worked together, I was pretty much at the messiest time in my life. I was working at three different, physically demanding jobs, being under-paid, attempting but failing my teaching degree, dealing with full-blown insomnia, and partying WAY too many nights a week. I had also gone from one ridiculous boy situation, to another, even MORE ridiculous boy situation - which went on for the next five-or-so years (Yes, I'm serious. Like I said, MESSY).
Now, the interesting thing here, is that even at that time, despite the mess I was creating around me - and despite of our age difference (she was in her 30's at the time), I often found myself supporting my friend in the very same way I do for clients now! Talking with my boyfriend after I hung up the phone, took me back to those days, and somehow in spite of the hangovers and sleep deprivation - the memories of our personal struggles, and the pain I was trying to numb were super vivid. I sat with them for a few minutes, before realising that memories like these are EXACTLY why I believe in the work I'm doing.
I honestly believe that we're given this decade known as our 20's to try shit out, fall down, destroy some stuff, and learn what works and what doesn't, (and even as I'm typing this, I'm worried it will come out sounding super dull and boring) so that by the time we hit our 30's, we have enough of an idea of what serves us (As well as what doesn't!) so we can seriously kick arse and really make the most of our time here.
And believe me, I know just how challenging this shit can be to sift through. But what happens if we get to the end of our 20's, or even to the end of our 30's, 40's or even the end of our 50's, not having learned these lessons? Do we just keep on repeating the same patterns, living out the same (in my case, destructive) behaviours? I truly get that sometimes, all you need is someone to hug you while you cry it out, and others you really need to hear is, "Harden the fuck up, and sort your shit out already!" from someone who genuinely gets you.
I want to tell you, that even though over the last two weeks, I've had moments where I've bordered on overwhelm with my workload, not only does it feel worthwhile when I know that I'm working with Rad Bitches and Girl Bosses so that they don't keep living out the same stories over and over. It feels worthwhile when I remember that I now know and understand my limits, and that the work I'm doing is challenging me in ways I genuinely enjoy. I'm growing, and I'm learning every day, and the challenges are nowhere near as overwhelming - let alone soul crushing, as the ones I used to go into battle against every day.
In light of all of this, I sat down and wrote an ebook, which you can download for FREE!
I've included some of my most favourite pieces of wisdom, which have helped me get through some of the most challenging times in my life!
I'm sharing this with you all, in the hope that if you’ve come across this little book at a time when you’re feeling stuck, or maybe even find yourself screaming, “LIFE, WHY YOU BE SO HARD FOR???” that you’ll be able to flip through it, and know that you’re not alone!
I'd love to know what you think of it!
In other news, Jess and I have been working hard behind the scenes to put my first coaching package together; I've been completing my course work; joining in on practical coaching sessions with my classmates; as well as participating in a new project with the amazing Elle Roberts (stay tuned, I'll be announcing the details of this in the coming weeks!).
I sat my Level 1 Health and Wellness Coaching certification exam yesterday, before Jordan and I headed into the city for an Art Gallery and Bagel Date to celebrate.
We visited ACCA, the NGV International, and Anna Schwartz, before walking down to the (still essentially abandoned) Docklands precinct for the exhibition opening at D11.
Thanks again for stopping by, and than you to everyone who has shared their support and words of encouragement over the last few weeks and months. I really appreciate your thoughts!
Until next time,